Sweet Surprise or The Marshmallow Blobs Affair

 

By Phill Boas

Elat had been sitting for nearly an hour with newspapers spread on the kitchen table. His wife, initially interested in some of the articles he had read her out loud, now wanted to get on with her day’s chores. As he began his daily rant about one of the articles she gently kissed him on the forehead and, lifting his arm suggested that now would be an excellent time for him to take his newspapers and retire to his study where he could give them uninterrupted attention. 

Elat knew that this was a suggestion he should take. He was fuming over the blatant lying and undisguised self-interest that was at the centre of the political news of the day as it reported about another party replacement of a sitting Prime Minister who had actually been voted in by the Australian people. The challenger had clearly been supported by a colleague who had blatantly lied about his future intentions. Elat began to muse quietly to himself about the way Parliamentarians consistently behaved badly.

 

The note on the Speakers lectern in both Houses of the Australian Parliament simply read:

“All elected representatives of both Houses of Parliament with be subject to a regime of behavioural inducements. These will continue until the insensitive, childlike, self-interested, unstatesmanlike and dysfunctional behaviour of members has ceased and both Houses of this Parliament are acting in the interests of the Australian People both long and short term.”

It was simply signed: A spokesperson for the Australian People.

The Speakers of both houses assumed it was a joke and simply put it aside.

Note:

Starting that day, during Question Time, with the House in session; whenever a member issued a facetious comment directed against a member from their opposition the member would receive a splat of very nice tasting marshmallow like substance—about an inch in diameter—on the forehead, which needed to be wiped off but could, the Speaker informed members, he had been informed, be safely eaten. It appeared to have been flicked from the other side of the house but the exact location of the person responsible could never be detected. 

Immediately after this began there were strong complaints from each recipient and the speaker would find a note on his rostrum naming the childlike or otherwise inappropriate behaviour for which the small sweet projectile had been sent.

It was freaky, but, within the hour, members realised that whatever was the source of these missives/missiles they were unable to be prevented and with increasingly fewer backslidings, both houses began to settle down to a new more adult form of engagement.

The same thing happened when a member lied or misrepresented their position or misinformed someone on what they had or had not said or done.

Within a month, the politicians of the Australian Parliament were behaving in entirely new and refreshing ways. Promises were not being made because every lying promise or potentially unfulfillable promise received a splat of the delicious marshmallowy projectile coming from no-one-knew-where. 

Misinformation received the same treatment as did a considerable suite of undiplomatic behaviours and behaviours motivated by self-interest rather than community or societal concerns. Politicians were being publicly shamed and forced to take account of the short, medium and long term consequences of their actions and commitments. They were also being strongly discouraged from pursuing their personal or party political and sectional interests when they conflicted with the overall public good. 

A new era was being created in the Australian parliament amongst its political denizens.

Good social engineering was the final thought Elat had as his wife tapped him gently on the shoulder and he blinked and realised she was putting his tea down beside his newspapers.

Elat #30

31/08/2018

ELAT- Guilty by Accusation

Elat – Guilty by Accusation

by Phill Boas

Elat had been listening to the news, the Coach of his football team had just resigned because of the awful performance of the team since the drug scandal. For no reason other than his public record, Elat believed James was a good man. The seemingly inappropriate behaviour of the AFL executive and the national Australian Sports Anti Doping Authority angered and frustrated him. His team had been punished only because they had been accused. ASADA had after more than two years of bumbling around failed to convict anyone of anything. Nevertheless his team and the coach had been punished because they had been accused.

Elat went to bed furious, because after two years of failing to find anything ASADA having lost their case sent the problem to the World Anti Doping Authority. No-one seemed to think their failure meant anything! Now his favourite coach had been forced out. Guilty by accusation did not seem to be the democratic way. His team had lost their draft picks and been prevented from playing finals- how was that appropriate? Since when were people in Australia guilty until proven innocent?

Elat tossed and turned, his sleep restless. The local Parking Inspector was writing a ticket for a local female resident of Elat’s township when the attractive young woman who owned the car came  back to her car. She asked him to not write the ticket but he did not take any notice of her. She claimed he had been sexually harassing her, had offered to stop writing the ticket if he would sleep with him. He was stood down pending an enquiry. The story was picked up by the local then the national news. The same week the young woman who made the (false) allegation and who worked as the Personal Assistant to a State Union Secretary refused to  witness the signature of the Union’s Lawyer for a document setting up an odd and possibly illegal slush fund. The following week she was put on report for failing to obey a legitimate order, not for the Slush Fund signature, but for something in which she had actually not been involved. However, she could not prove she had not been involved because it was her word against her boss’s word. She was then required to front up to a workplace disputes tribunal.

Meanwhile, the Parking Inspector’s wife, having heard the accusation against her husband took the children and went to stay with her mother, not wanting to be with a man who sexually harassed women and refused to acknowledge his bad behaviour by lying about it.

Elat was outraged. How could it be that accusations by people who has something to gain from  the situation could take control of people’s lives. He realised he must be very naiive.

It turned out, on the same day the Parking Inspector was required to turn up to the tribunal regarding his sexual harassment the young woman was required by the tribunal and the two found themselves in the same waiting area prior to their cases being heard. The two looked at one another somewhat askance. When the young woman realised the consequences for the Inspector of her accusation she went and formally withdrew her complaint.

It turned out that the Tribunal hearings were being heard by the Inspector’s Uncle. When the Inspector heard what had happened to the young woman he spoke to his uncle and he was able to have her case dismissed for lack of valid evidence.

Elat  felt that fairness and equity had been established and stopped thrashing around and settled quietly to a sound sleep before his wife called him to come and have his cup of tea.

Elat & Senior Women in Organisations

Elat was pounding the table. Again. His wife sternly admonished him and gently suggested he retire to his study and write. He did as she bid him, it was, he knew, wisest. His pounding had been after following a long program on ‘glass ceilings’, the lack of women in senior positions in government, business corporations, politics, in fact anywhere in organisations. He was heartily sick of what he considered the stupidity of much of the discussions.
Now Elat was not a sexist man, usually. He believed that there were two very different models of the world. He believed that organisations were for the most part created using a masculine model of the world, which was in itself, somewhat warlike, aggressive competitive, combative, rational, often somewhat bullying, hard edged and hierarchical. Now of course this was also a description of rational thinking types who preferred their decisions to be made quickly on the minimal possible set of data and some women, it has to be said, were like this.
He thought that women could also offer a feminine model of the world that was more co-operative, less aggressive and more supportive, more sensitive and considerate, more harmonious and emotionally aware, softer edged and more communal, but not any the less, effective, competent or complex. And, he was sure, it would be bitchy and have unpleasantness.
What frustrated him was that most of the women he saw on TV or heard on the radio, seemed to be women who had learned how to operate in a male model of the world, though not being of male gender. This made him unhappy.
He sat at his keyboard and meditated peacefully to the sound of rain and thunderstorms playing quietly on his computer. His sister had just become the COO of Telopticon and had offered her boss the CEO a special deal. She knew he wanted an aggressive go getting man in her position and had someone in mind, but the Board had instructed him to get a suitable woman and she was that person, a quiet, very smart, well qualified and a gentle caring person. They were a national but small Telco, if she could not expand their customer base and improve the share price within a year she would leave the job and give him the opportunity to put his preferred candidate in her position. But, he had to give her a totally free hand to re-organise the business without ANY overt or covert interference of any kind. Was he agreeable, yes, of course he was, he was quite sure she was about to sink herself, and that would be that.
She closed down 90% of the call centres. She offered all the staff the opportunity to be made redundant or join her customer service training and delivery program. Most accepted and for 6 months they were trained and developed to within an inch of their lives. They learned professional courtesy, working together support skills, they learned every aspect of the customer experience and how to take care of customers, more surprising to them, they learned to feel cared for! They learned to take total responsibility for ensuring that every customer concern was taken up, dealt with positively, and followed through to completion. They were rewarded for every evidence of customer satisfaction and were always supported to ensure that no customer ever left Telopticon. Whenever they acquired a new customer they were always to contact them and ensure that they got outstanding service, for which they were always praised by relationally courteously trained managers. They were given extra phone lines to ensure that no customer who wanted help ever failed to get it on their first call.
Within 8 months, the organisation was losing only 2% of their usual monthly customer loss rate and within 11 months were picking up new customers from other Telcos at a rate 5 times greater than when they had been using call centres. The final irony occurred when the CEO went to the Board behind her back to get her replaced by a more suitable male, and was told that his services were no longer required and that his COO had just been offered his job. Elat blinked and sat up at his computer smiling happily hearing his wife calling out to ask if he wanted a cup of tea.

The Servants R Revolting 1

Elat was steaming again.  Elat had been parking their car under a shady tree in town so his dog would be safe in the shade. He had been doing this for the past year and had last week, for the first time, received a parking ticket from another officious public servant. The man had told Elat that he did not care whether Elat had been parking there since childhood, it was simply illegal and here was the $150 fine to prove it.  Elat tossed and turned  a great deal that night.

Suddenly Elat knew what he must do.  When the parking attendant took his wife shopping that weekend he overstayed his one-hour limit parking and a policeman was there to book him.  The parking attendant was furious, but Elat and his wife were there to assure him, he had definitely exceeded his one-hour limit by 2 minutes.  When the Shire officer next stopped to speak with a neighbour, Elat was there with his friendly police officer to ensure he was booked for illegal and dangerous parking.  The Shire officer was furious, but Elat reminded him how wrong it was to abuse a Public Servant doing his duty.  Then, when the by now frustrated and upset official tried to phone his boss from his car, the earpiece would not work and he picked up the phone to complete the conversation illegally.  The same officer pulled him over again and gave him another on-the-spot fine. He was beside himself with rage and indignation.

Elat was just warming up.  In response to a small advertisement he placed in the local paper, 120 persons contacted him to register complaints about the behaviour of Shire employees.  Twenty of them had complaints about four Shire officials whose responsibility it was to ensure that Shire regulations were not abused.  The group visited the Shire President and put to her that the uncivil behaviour of some of her staff was unacceptable and should, they believed, be unacceptable to her.  She was, unable to disagree.  Elat and his supporters wanted the council to make civility and care in dealings with the public a primary duty all Shire employees needed to show in dealing with the public.  The President agreed that in future all Shire workers would be required to demonstrate civility in their dealings with members of the public.  Elat then produced his letters of complaint and informed her that there were several other matters involving council employee’s behaviour and Council procedures that were disturbing local residents.  This turned out to be too much for the Shire President who then became angry and accused Elat of being a troublemaker.  Elat was able to point out to her, that it was not only a citizens duty to inform a public bureaucracy, in a democratic society, of areas where its behaviour was inequitable, but that it was her contracted responsibility to do something about it.

When she refused and had him thrown out of her office, he went to a well-known stirrer on the staff at the local newspaper.  The reporter was delighted to get a juicy story and when he rang the Shire President whilst Elat was still with him, he got an earful from her, not only about Elat, but about his failure to recognise his responsibilities as a journalist.  This of course did not impress him and he immediately begun a campaign to have her replaced.  At the next council meeting she made a public apology and promised to clean up the Council employees acts, and thanked Elat.

When Elat awoke, his wife was telling him his tea was getting cold.

End

The Servants are Revolting 2

 

By Phill Boas

 

Elat was steaming!  He had lit a fire Tuesday afternoon to burn the ever-increasing piles of un-mulchable leaves on his one-acre block.  It was not the fire restriction season.  What he did not know, and should have known, was that no fires were permitted Tuesdays or Wednesdays in his area.  A Ranger driving a Shire vehicle had pulled up at his gate and spoken to his wife.  She had come to tell Elat to put out the fire and she was clearly very distressed.  It turned out that the person from the Shire had told her that the fire should not have been lit and that if she did not put it out immediately he could fine them up to $2000.  He was, she said, officious, ill mannered, and in fact simply rude and she thought that he had no right to behave that way, wasn’t he a servant of the people, didn’t they call themselves civil servants?

 

Suddenly Elat realised that this feeling of being a victim must end, by which he meant, now.  It was Wednesday and Elat went out and lit a fire. Today the leaves would get burned.  The Shire Ranger driving past tried to toot his horn, Elat waved merrily at him although the horn made no sound.  He attempted to turn his car in to Elat’s drive; he would put a stop to this illegal behaviour.  The car would not turn; it just continued down the road.  He wrestled with the steering wheel to no avail.  He got out his mobile to ring Elat. The phone would not work.  He drove back to the office to replace the phone and serve Elat with a Breach of Regulations notice.

 

He was unable to get out of his car, every attempt resulted in him banging and shouting more and more loudly.  Finally people coming into the car park became disturbed.  His supervisor came out and opened the car door.  By this time the Ranger was furious, abusive, outraged and incoherent. He tried desperately to tell his Supervisor about Elat and his flaunting the Regulations.  Words coming out of his mouth seemed to belong to someone else.  The supervisor was not pleased with the Ranger nor with Elat’s wife.  He had just had a conversation with her in which she had registered a formal complaint of bullying and harassment against the Ranger.  Elat’s wife’s phone call of complaint about uncivil behaviour by the Ranger, his supervisor could now see, was entirely likely to have been correct.  He shushed the Ranger and informed him that he was to be sent to a customer-relation’s seminar starting on Monday.

 

All might have ended there, had he not decided to also send out the Breach of Regulations notice.  The office printer simply fed a nice clean new sheet of paper through each time he hit print.  He was not a man to give up easily, forgetting that he was there to provide service to residents of the area, he phoned a friend at the local Forest service to ask for his help in dealing with Elat.  This, of course, turned out to be a huge mistake.  When the Forester arrived at Elat’s place, he could not park his car because of a large cleaning vehicle from the council that was trimming trees.  He was told by the driver, in an officious manner to go home.  Outraged he tried unsuccessfully to contact his Ranger colleague, finally he gave up and went home.

Elat’s brow smoothed out, his breathing steadied and his wife decided it was time for his wake-up cup of tea.

602 words

Elat #8

 

Elat The Council and The New Room

Elat, the Council & the New Room
Phill Boas

It had not been one of Elat’s better weeks. Elat and his wife wanted to add a small room on to the back of their house so that Elat’s wife would have a room in which to sow. Elat had spoken to a local builder; they had put in their plans to the council and were awaiting their permit. Nothing happened for 5 weeks. Next thing all their neighbours got a letter asking what objections they had to the Council letting Elat build his new room. Elat was outraged. Elat only found this out because his neighbour on one side, the neighbour who had the big tree whose branches kept falling into Elat’s yard, and causing damage to his vegetable patch, came in waving the letter. He was asking whether the room would be close enough to his place to be struck by falling branches. If this was so, he would be objecting to Elat building it because he did not need any more harassment from Elat. When Elat phoned the council to point out that the room would be virtually invisible from anywhere outside his property he was told this was irrelevant to the procedure which needed to be followed. Elat wanted to know why the procedure should apply in this case and was told he simply did not understand local government.
That night Elat had a restless night, but got a huge shot of energy and found himself feeling very creative. When the council worker responsible for sending out neighbour letters typed the routine letter, she found herself typing a request for support for his project. Her letter included a briefer statement that they would be willing to hear from anyone who felt they should not grant the approval together with reasons. Elat received one of these letters also; with a hand note saying that the council hoped they would be able to expedite his application. Elat visited all his friends in the area who agreed to send letters of support, 120 did so, citing many instances where Elat had been helpful to themselves, the local community and the council. The next-door neighbour it turned out was hoping to build a gardening shed over the coming year. Immediately he received his letter he sought out Elat to reassure him he would not be making any objections. He assured Elat, if any pruning of his tree were needed he would be willing to do it. An officious busybody who lived behind Elat and filled his time with legal harassment at every opportunity, objected but forgot to mail his letter. Three weeks after Elat had sought the permit, his builder received permission to proceed. Elat was delighted. To show his willingness to be active in community affairs Elat agreed to stand for the local council. Elat was sponsored as a local counsellor and won on a landslide. Elat next won a hotly contested vote requiring all local council procedures to be reviewed in terms of their citizen-friendliness. Elat’s review panel supported a new CEO who guaranteed to get permit applications handled within a maximum of 14 days and to refocus all council procedures to be citizen-friendly, i.e. consumer-oriented. Elat arranged for the new CEO to have all staff receive some serious customer service delivery training. He also made certain that the new CEO knew all the 220 council staff by name and could tell him about them. When Elat woke up that morning he was feeling very satisfied and looking forward to his wife brewing his cup of tea.

End
602 words
Elat # 7

Elat’s Mayor – Council Business

Elat’s Mayor – Ministry Business

It turned out that the Mayor from Elat’s town had decided to take his wife on a holiday overseas, however, when he went to the travel agent he was told that she would have to send out letters to his constituents asking if any of them had any objections to the agent selling him tickets for the holiday. The mayor was outraged but the travel agent explained, a new procedure was in place to ensure there were no local repercussions from a constituency due to the Mayor’s absence. Complaints she explained, would be sent to the Local Government Ministry for adjudication, this procedure took approximately six weeks. In the meantime, the Mayor was at liberty to make a tentative booking, in case there were no serious objections, which the Ministry upheld.
The mayor’s wife was distressed, the Mayor was outraged and so he phoned the Ministry for Local Affairs and was told, ever so politely, there were rules and regulations and that they applied, especially to people in his position and that being a Local Government officer, surely he of all people could understand that.
The Mayor tried to purchase the tickets directly from the airline, but was told most apologetically that in order to ensure that no-one was disadvantaged, the airline could only sell him his tickets through a local travel agent to ensure that everyone who had an interest in the Mayors well-being, had a chance to express their concerns before he took any action that might have adverse consequences for them. No matter who he contacted, the Mayor found himself hedged in by rules and regulations that took account, seemingly, of everyone’s interests but his.
It so happened that Elat had submitted a request for a permit to extend his house, adding a room for his growing family and had been told that this would be impossible because his house would then be 1% over the limit permitted for dwellings on land of his size. Elat could get no satisfaction regarding his permit when he heard about the Mayor’s upcoming holiday. Elat contacted several of his friends who wrote letters of objection against the Mayor’s overseas trip.
The Mayor got several of his friends to write in saying they all thought it was a good thing for the Mayor to go overseas. When the letters arrived at the Ministry the letters of support were held in a basket called ‘pending’ as no-one had ever received letters of support for an idea before, mainly because the Ministry had never asked for them. The Ministry only ever asked for complaints, as that was what was required. Everyone knew that was what everyone needed to be concerned about.
The Ministry took several weeks to check the situation because the next meeting to which applications could be presented was another month away. The Mayor did not hear anything, so after six weeks he phoned the Ministry to be told that his application would be going to a meeting in two weeks, he would be notified in due course. Finally he was told that although the objections had been dismissed the letters of support were a problem and that Elat had some letters like them for his Housing permit request and all this meant he was required back for the next Ministry meeting in five weeks time. It was going to be a very short trip, the Mayor decided there would be some changes regarding applications when he returned. Elat woke up happy that day and his wife could be heard brewing his tea in the kitchen.

Elat’s Brother’s Children’s New Computer

Elat’s Brother’s Children’s New Computer

Phill Boas

Sometimes Elat’s wife was sure, the newspapers had printed a story just to annoy Elat; today was one of those days.  Elat had just been reading how children these days were in need of drugs for something called ADD, which everyone seemed to be getting.  But yesterday he had read that children were buying bad drugs, which were being sold to them, by people who probably didn’t make as much money as the people who sold the good drugs that they needed!  At first Elat was confused, who, he wondered, were the people who were deciding which were the good and which the bad drugs, then he realised that probably everyone was being conned and then Elat was enraged.

His brother’s children, there were three of them, weren’t allowed out to play because it wasn’t safe, apparently because of the selling of drugs on the street and violence, and sitting in front of the new computer Elat’s brother and sister-in-law had bought for them was safer and more educational, but, there were some bad things they could access on the internet and Elat’s brother hadn’t figured out exactly what to do about that.

Elat’s brother’s children were hyperactive and did not sleep well.  In a moment of devilishness, Elat snuck into his brother’s house and made the computer glitch.  The children sat there looking blank.  Elat took them by the hand downstairs and out into the street to play.  Elat and his brother had always been sent out into the street to play with the other children whose parents had sent them out into the street to play so they could get some peace and the children could get some exercise and learn how to get on with other children.

Elat’s brother’s children stood in the street and wondered what to do, Elat became invisible.  Now he could watch without influencing the children.  The children played ball for a while before some other children who always played in the street met them and took their ball away.  Elat watched, the new children played with the ball and Elat’s brother’s children seemed not to know what to do.  They got cross and upset and explained to the new children that this was their ball, that they could play with them but not take over their game.  The new children got angry and pushed them away, one of the new children took out a knife and threatened Elat’s brother’s children, Elat watched carefully, Elat’s brother’s children were afraid, Elat made the knife into rubber and when Elat’s brother’s children ran to get their ball and the child with the knife stabbed the eldest and the rubber knife bent, Elat’s brother’s children laughed and took their ball back.

The new children got a fright and ran away.  Elat’s brother’s children, pleased with themselves, left their ball and went to the local shop.  They had no money but wanted some sweets, which they were never allowed to have at home.  The shop owner gave them sweets for delivering a parcel for him.  They ran to the local park, climbed the trees and decided they would like a cubby house here.  Then they realised it was late and they were hungry and they ran home.  Elat’s sister-in-law was amazed when she called them for dinner and they were happy and tired, that night they went to bed and slept soundly.  Elat’s brother was happy the new computer had solved their problem.

Elat awoke this spring morning feeling very happy. He could hear his wife brewing the tea.

Elat & The Holocaust

Elat & The Holocaust

Phill Boas

Elat had been subjected to too many Holocaust stories this week.  He was angry at the Nazi’s, the German people in general and the Jews in particular.  How could they have allowed themselves to be fooled by the Nazi’s, his wife had shaken her head at him, she wondered how could he be so naïve?  He was back in pre-war Germany, 1939, looking at Neuman Strassa a street of Jewish families, he was watching a column of army trucks approaching the area.  They pulled up at either end of the street and troops poured from them and formed up on the street.

Inside the houses people were running around or standing at the windows staring.  They were asking what was going on, telling each other fragments of stories they had heard about being moved to transit locations.  Elat was furious.  He thought they should have known what was actually going on, and obviously they didn’t.  The tannoy in the street was blaring out instructions.  They were to pack whatever they needed into one small suitcase, that was all; they were to come immediately out into the street, hurry they were told.

The soldiers approached the first house, Elat watched, they banged on the door and as soon as it was opened started issuing orders, instructions and harassing the family who were, by this time, running around getting their possessions together.  Suddenly the soldiers stopped speaking, seemed unable to understand what they were doing there, felt the need to leave and did.  The officers put the men back in the trucks and they all went home.  The street, slowly settled back to normal, the families looking confused and anxious.

The next morning another convoy of trucks was sent to get the job done, they were equally unsuccessful and the Nazi high command realised that the Jews were up to some nasty business.  A single messenger was sent to the street to tell the Jews to be ready to leave; he never got to the street, became confused en route and returned to his barracks.  The families did not seem to understand that the threat was real, Elat did not know what to do.

The High Command ordered the street to be levelled by tank fire.  After the first round the tanks seemed unable to reload and the barrage never happened.  The families in the street still seemed unable to come to terms with the threat.  No one left or made any move to act!  The High Command were not used to their orders not being met, they sent specially trained SS troops, but when these arrived at Neuman Strasse they became confused, and marched around the streets all night singing military songs.

The city was attracting too much publicity; Elat was unable to get his Jews  to take the Nazi threat seriously.  He tossed and turned on this night, never had he had so much difficulty finding a solution that pleased him.  Holding off the Nazi’s was only a part of the solution, the Jewish families needed to take the Nazi threat seriously but after watching the SS troops wander around the streets all night singing this was becoming increasingly unlikely.  Elat’s help was being turned against him, his frustration grew, what was he missing?  His wife had told him to get a grip on himself, to pay more attention to the nature of the issue, but Elat was just furious and outraged.  His solution, anyone who approached the street became confused.  His street lived through the war.  His wife had tea and Asprin ready for him when he woke in the morning.

 

Elat &The Iraqi Sunrise

Elat & the Iraqi Sunrise

By Phill Boas

Elat was not himself today the news of massacres, murders and killing in Iraq was seriously depressing him.  He was tired of seeing the murderous scenes, it was bad enough madmen killing one another for no meaningful reason, but killing innocent passers by, including women and children, that was too much.  He knew what they were doing was wrong and he was not going to be subjected to bigoted madness and cruelty in the name of someone’s rightness.  This was a mixture of religious and nationalistic stupidity beyond reason, beyond fairness, beyond his level of tolerance.  He focussed on Falugia and was aware of a Muslim cleric giving instructions to his aide. “No” Elat thought and the cleric was unable to speak, frustrated he reached for paper but his hands would not work.  The aide fearful for his safety left the room and the cleric was left inarticulate and alone.  A group of local militia planning a raid could not remember what they were doing and went instead to lunch.  Two American soldiers facing a crowd of armed Iraqi militiamen from one of the religious extremist groups were unable to pull the triggers of their weapons; the militiamen were unable to fight so they began to sing in the street.  All over people were having new experiences.  A young woman strapping bombs to her body to blow herself up suddenly took them off, burst into laughter and ran home to her irate and confused family.  For 7 days not a shot was fired in Iraq, not a bomb exploded, not a single instruction to fight or fire a weapon seemed to be able to be given by anyone.

The situation was becoming desperate. If they could not express themselves with violence what were they to do?  The first new report was of a Sheeite and a Suuni Imam facing off in a war of words whilst their armed but impotent militia stood helplessly aside watching and listening.  Next the American General in charge of US forces in Iraq offered his resignation, unable to give any orders that would result in killing.  Finally shouting matches broke out all over the country, but no one was able to progress the shouting to violence.  Many people were very frustrated.  Elat was feeling a little better but not yet really satisfied.  Something else was needed.  The Imam’s argument gave him the inspiration, suddenly they were saying only what they thought and felt about their perception of things.  Listeners cringed in horror.  “My way is the right way” each was shouting, “all ways except mine are wrong”, “I have spent my life gaining respect from those around me, now they will listen to my words”.  “If they are not distracted by fighting and hatred they will cease to come to my prayers.”  Soon all those listening found themselves speaking their thoughts out loud, no matter what they seemed to want to say.  Even so, no one was able to do any harm or physical violence to anyone else.  Some of the cleverer ones tried emotional blackmail, suddenly they were confused and could not speak, they went and made themselves, cups of tea.  Shopkeepers trying to sell their wares, found themselves unable to lie about the fair price of their products. A bureaucrat in the midst of lining his pockets with a lucrative government contract found himself blurting out the details of his scheme.  In a month people were finding ways to live together without hate and the troops were sent home.  Elat awoke feeling peaceful and hungry and smelt the kitchen smells and called to his wife.